Dali

We arrived in New Dali (skyscrapers, big roads etc.) at 5am after another comfortable sleeper train journey. The buses to Old Dali (ancient, quirky town) did not start running until 6.30am and a friendly Chinese couple approached us to share a taxi there. We squeezed into the nearest taxi and a third of the way into the journey the driver did a U-turn, saying she wanted to pick up 2 more people. There was no chance of managing this without us sitting on each others laps and so I found a slightly more expensive, legal taxi for us to share when we stopped back at square 1. We don't have much luck with taxi drivers.
We arrived in Old Dali which was still asleep apart from an old man just starting to make steamed buns. The Chinese couple spoke to him and we sat down to drink tea and watch him make our breakfast. Along with the tasty sausage meat buns we had porridge with pickled cabbage, which was OK. The Chinese couple then woke up a guesthouse for us and found us a room and then they left.
Old Dali is a bit unreal, it looks a lot like the old China one sees in films, with ornate gates, canal networks and temples nestled between misty mountains and a giant lake. All this only slightly ruined by hordes of Chinese tourists carrying huge cameras. We explored and in the evening we almost went into a bar but were approached by a kung-fu and tai ji master called xiao bin. We arranged for lessons early the next day and so we skipped the bar and went back to get some rest.
During the kung fu lesson we played a couple of balance and strength games. One where you stand, legs far apart, infront of the opponent. You put your hand on their stomach, and slowly and firmly try to push them over. Xiao Bin weighed 50kg, but he was beating us all, including a very strong French man. I asked to have another go, he said I could have 20 more goes, it would make no difference. Then I beat him! A couple of times too. And the Frenchie. I also beat him at a frog jumping race. So that's kung fu mastered then, the only thing he could do that I couldn't was kick himself in the head. We moved onto tai ji where we memorized a succession of flowing movements. After an hour of that Xiao Bin took the 2 Frenchmen and Kae and I to the market and bought some food and some beer and took it to his house where a girl cooked it for us. Xiao bin showed us how to smash the base of a glass bottle full of water by hitting the top with the flat of your hand. The big Frenchie eventually managed to do it, but might have broken his thumb. Xiao Bin also showed us his new sword, which he uses to scare off groups of drunks who want to take him on. He says unarmed he can take on 3 people but any more than that and he needs his sword.
The next day we took a cable car up into the mountains. Just before this a gypsy woman cursed Kae by flicking her boob. Luckily Kae new a counter curse and reflected it back on the old hag. We saw the gypsy earlier on and our waitresses were making fun of her, but crapped themselves and ran away when the gypsy came near them.
We checked into the only hotel up the nearest mountain, the Higherland Inn, with amazing views of Dali, friendly staff, a peaceful garden with a Taoist cave, and no electricity. We walked around on the mountain and had some strong Tibetan rice wine by candlelight. The man who runs the hotel is from Tibet and told me that all their alcoholic drinks are 60% proof or stronger. We also met a Chinese illustrator and a Brit called Lenny.
Lenny has done a fair bit of travelling in Asia, you can tell by how he talks, in a simple and slow pidgin "I go to China. China is very good. I am happy here in China." He talks to me and Kae like this too, which is amazingly annoying. Lenny had met the owner of the Higherland Inn while in Thailand 2 years previous and he had fallen for her, but they went their seperate ways. Lenny had flown to China to find her, but he was too late, she had married a Swiss after knowing him for 6 days and moved to Switzerland. So now we were stuck with him.
We hiked up into the forest the next day, not just to escape Lenny. The forest was beautiful, and we ate some snickers (chocolate is more expensive than gold, in China). We took the cablecar down (the only thing more expensive than chocolate), and left the national park. If I had been caught with my lighter during our stay I would have been charged between 50 and 100 quid, and had to sign a form 3 times stating that I didn't have one, so I smuggled it in and out. Jack 1, communist China 0.